Mom puts foot down after grandma brings 'humiliating gifts' for granddaughters, asks them to 'toughen up'

Everything we do around a child—how we communicate, act, and express ourselves—affects them. A child’s confidence and self-esteem are primarily strengthened through the support of their loved ones. However, it works the other way as well. Putting a child down, embarrassing them, or being careless around them can destroy their confidence. A mom who goes by u/Your_Lydia on Reddit shared that when her mother-in-law brought “embarrassing” gifts for her children and tried to “toughen them up” about those gifts, she felt she had no choice but to react strongly. The mom mentioned that she has two teenage daughters, ages 13 and 14.

The grandmother wanted to bring them some gifts, as she was meeting them after a long time. While the mom agreed, she had no idea what the gifts would be. “What she brought them was absolutely terrible—humiliating, even,” the mom remarked. Things were great until it was time to open the presents. “She asked my 14-year-old to open her gift first. She had brought her a shaver and a condom,” the mom noted. The mom was “disgusted” by the gift, but she controlled her reaction. The grandmother, however, carelessly stated that it was “a perfect gift and that she’s going to need it.” The mom was baffled to discover that even her 13-year-old daughter had received the same gift.

Overwhelmed with emotion, the mom immediately asked the grandmother to leave, but she refused. Things got even worse. Upon seeing her granddaughters in tears after receiving their gifts, the grandmother told them to “toughen up” and that “it’s not so serious”.

“I started screaming that this was not okay and that she was a psychopath for bringing them these ‘gifts’. She said she was just trying to do something nice and began to cry,” the mom wrote. Nevertheless, she did not tolerate the disrespect for another second and “shoved” the woman out of her home. In an edit, the mom added, “She was not being funny; she was speaking in a serious tone.” People were appalled by the grandmother’s carefree attitude and reckless behavior. As parents, many noted that it was a horrible gift and gesture. u/Odd_Knowldegd_2146 said, “I am a massive advocate for good sexual health and good sexual education. This was neither of those things. Dumping a razor and a condom is inappropriate and uncomfortable.” u/Acrobatic_Increase69 added, “Who in their right mind gives these things to a 13-year-old and 14-year-old?” Several people noted that such topics are sensitive and should be discussed with caution, especially with kids at that age.

u/Garden_Lady_2 said, “These are not appropriate gifts for your girls. You did not overreact. I can't imagine how tough it must have been to talk to your girls about their inappropriate 'gifts'.” u/RandomAho remarked, “That wasn't preparing kids for the future, that was weird and cynical. I don't think your mother-in-law should be around minors without supervision.” u/quarkfan4552 added, “I agree hygiene and birth control are important issues but they need to be handled privately between parent and child. This should be done safely so that dignity is preserved, values are discussed, and communication can remain open."