Woman told her best friend of 20 years she was terminally ill and expected her to be devastated — instead, what she asked about left her stunned
No one wants to hear that their loved one has little time to live. When faced with such shattering news, it may be hard to control how we respond. Yet, one woman’s reaction left her best friend of 20 years in dismay. The woman who goes by u/PuzzleQueen408 on Reddit shared a post on August 16, 2026, revealing that she had a chronic illness. She finally broke the news to her close pal, expecting her to be heartbroken. To her surprise, instead of being blank, angry, or upset, the woman had a reckless reply. She made an inquiry that no one saw coming.
The woman explained that after sharing a friendship for 20 years, she didn’t expect her to take the news well. But nothing prepared her for the way her friend responded. After learning that she doesn’t have much time to live, the person “started calling dibs on various belongings, mostly nicer gifts from my husband.” She didn’t inquire about her condition, her health, her treatment, or anything else. Instead, her focus remained on one thing — her luxury belongings. While there were plans to leave something behind for her, after learning of her selfish response, the woman refused to keep anything aside for her.
In the post, she explained that it could be that her friend wasn’t sure how to respond and was just coping differently. Yet, that barely sufficed as an excuse for her reply. In a comment, she explained how defending her didn’t feel valid because she had always been making excuses for her behavior. Moreover, the fact that she was fixated on her belongings instead of losing her made her feel worse. “She mentioned a coat that she’s only seen once nearly a decade ago,” the woman explained. In another comment, she shared that it was her first response after learning about her illness. “I thought it was intended to be lighthearted. But she has continued to message me requesting multiple things without having a genuine conversation with me,” she added. The friend reportedly didn’t even make any effort to visit her.
As the woman mentioned, “Being able to show up for the people we love is an honor.” It may be difficult, but it is what our loved ones need during such unpredictable times. According to Daniel Cameron, MD, a physician and published researcher in peer-reviewed medical journals, many people diagnosed with chronic illness lose even the dearest friends. Common reasons are a change in lifestyle and energy. Another factor is that with long-term illnesses, a sense of discomfort emerges. Friends might not know what to say, or might feel helpless. Even if death is a difficult topic, there had to be other ways to react. And that’s what those who could relate suggested too. u/MangoSuspicious5641 said, “Don't second-guess yourself or make excuses for her behavior.” u/Unlucky-Comfort4917 added, “This person isn't your friend.” u/mercijepense- remarked, “I am sorry that you have to deal with this on your journey.”
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