Daughter complained to dad about how mom ‘said no’ for ice cream — his response defines ‘parenting as a team’
Parents are often used to the concept of the good cop and the bad cop when it comes to their kids. While one parent gives in, the other is forced to make sacrifices and be stern in the best interest of the child. Parenting is meant to be balanced as a team. A mom therapist, Stacy McCann (@stacymccanlcsw), shared a beautiful example of how her husband did just that. McCann’s 6-year-old daughter was demanding ice cream and for her own reasons, she had to refuse. Instead of making her the bad cop, the dad stepped in with a unique response. Many parents are pondering this approach and applauding it for its honest and loving nature.
The mom mentioned that she refused the ice cream truck and her 6-year-old was undoubtedly upset about it. Like any child would, she hopped onto the other parent. The little girl went to her dad and complained about the fact that she refused and went on to ask him for some ice cream. The dad listened to his daughter but didn’t give in. Instead of siding with his little girl, he took a different approach. “Your mom said no. I don’t know why because I wasn’t there, but she had a reason,” he calmly explained. He started by reinforcing the mom’s decision and then supporting it. Furthermore, he tried to explain why McCann might have made the decision.
“I trust your mom and her reason. We’re a team and I won’t make any ice cream decisions without her,” he told his daughter. As a parent, he took a stand to coparent with his wife, all while explaining it to his 6-year-old in a composed manner. He shared the truthful reason, saying, “Mom and I have to be parents and that means keeping you safe and healthy. Whatever mama’s reason was, it was about keeping you safe or healthy.” His words likely changed the little girl’s perception or at least pushed her to think about it. Just like that, McCann was not the bad guy in the picture. Seeing her husband support her behind her back over a seemingly trivial thing like ice cream led to a wholesome realization.
The mom summarised this realization for all parents in a single statement. “Even if you’re not parenting together physically, in the same space, you’re still a team,” she remarked. She added that both parties (parents) need to be united on their decision before dealing with it to ensure the outcome is in the best interest of their child. Parents were inspired by the remarkable response the dad had. @nicolettecoastrealtor said, “Great husband. Teaming strong in front of your child! Wonderful to be packed up and work together.”
@engaging_curiosity1 noted, “Very articulate, loving and supportive to both mum and child.” @emily163 said that the dad’s response was “perfect” and added, “Parents are a team. You always agree in front of the child. You always show a united front and you disagree or debate in private afterward.” @joannadamelio added, “Great parenting by both. That's the way it should be.”
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You can follow Stacy McCann (@stacymccanslcw) on Instagram for more content on motherhood and parenting.
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