Decoding bro code: Men are revealing epic unspoken rules of male friendships and it's as fascinating as it gets
Men undoubtedly have their buddies who have stuck with them through thick and thin. There is an unshakable bond men share in male friendships due to the number of ups and downs they have been through. Many of these friendships build over decades, while others instantly connect over something unique. Men do have each other's backs, and, in a way, that makes you want to respect their relationship. Whether it is playing wingman, being loyal or even being the ride buddy and venting out loud, even male friendships hold rules that don't need to be said out loud but are diligently followed and accepted.
u/AmazingNugga asked in the r/AskMen forum on Reddit to share what these rules might be. The post read, "What's the unspoken rule in male friendships that no one teaches you but every man understands?" With over 600 responses, men stepped up with wonderful memories that helped them figure out what rules have defined some of their most life-changing friendships. These top 10 unspoken ones are what most strong male friendships revolve around and it interestingly gives a peek into the tough and spectacular world of male friendships.
1. Checking in subtly
"'You good?' is a mental health check." -u/VojakOne "My homies and I have known and leaned on each other for so long that when something is weighing on our hearts, the code is, 'Sauna evening this weekend?' Then, the whole pack gathers and shares a few drinks and goes in the sauna. It's perfect sitting there—sweating, listening to blues and telling them about your trouble while the council of men tries to solve it." -u/turbomomo
2. Respect where it's due
"One that I always adhere to is, never make your friends look bad in front of their girlfriends/wives. I can tease you about things and make fun of you while we're alone or with the boys, but if your girlfriend/wife is around, you're the greatest guy in the world." -u/AFriendTillTheEnd "There is nothing worse than a man who makes another man look bad in front of his partner. The only thing worse is making a guy look bad in front of his kids." -u/anilop
3. Leave exes alone
"Don’t pursue your friend’s ex. It’s crazy how many dudes seem not to have a sense of decency about this." -u/MisterBizzniss "Man, this has caused some crazy drama in my friend circles over the years. It's so weird how some people get it and others just don't. Now no one wants to hang out." -u/nikerbacher
4. The ultimate rule
"Never leave your brothers when shits about to go down. You have to stand up no matter the odds or the situation." -u/NoMacaron9816 "I may ruthlessly verbally abuse you. Make every joke under the sun and call you the dumbest shit I can come up with. But, we are the only ones allowed to talk to you like that. And in your worst moments, if I can't lift your spirits, I'll sit beside you in the dark." -u/eeeeeeEeeEee6
5. Acknowledge their challenges
"If your brother is venting, just shut up and let him talk. Don’t try to fix it, don’t drop advice bombs. Just vibe, nod, hit him with a 'Damn, man, that’s rough.' Sometimes, that’s all a dude really needs." -u/tomring "If you feel something is brewing in their life, and they ask you to 'grab a beer' with them, you go." -u/BigBadBootyDaddy10
6. Guys first
"Oftentimes, women come and go, but your close friends will always be there for you. It can't take a lot more for one of your brothers straight disown you or break off the friendship than it will take for a woman to leave a relationship." -u/user
7. Respect their significant other
"Never, ever, comment on a friend's partner, looks or personality. You're just asking for trouble. It doesn't matter if she's crazy or a 10/10 smoke show, keep it to yourself. If it is somehow brought up in conversation, keep it light." -u/messinginhessen
8. Stay in the silence
"The whole 'you don't have to talk about feelings' thing is definitely an unspoken rule. Sometimes, just hanging out in silence is the best therapy." -u/PlayfulNBusty "I've noticed that in male friendships, there's often an understanding that it's okay to sit in comfortable silence. We don't always need to fill the space with conversation; just being there is enough." -u/kobakip
9. Jokes = Bonding
"If you’ve made a d**k of yourself, the rest of the boys joking about it is their way of saying it isn’t that deep. We recognize and we forgive, but you must atone for your actions by way of being the target of the banter for a while. I think that’s why lads tend to have friends for life, we air out our shit with humor and move on." -u/trainer95
10. Don't play around with their stuff
"If you borrow their tools, bring it back in the same or better condition." -u/RevolvingCheetah "Same as if you borrow a vehicle you bring it back with the tank full or at least as much fuel as when you borrowed it. Preferably fuller." -u/kah43 "And don’t make them come asking for it while it’s collecting dust at your place. Return it as soon as you’re done." -u/Rajili