High school students volunteered as pallbearers for people with no family — and it became their biggest life lesson
It’s shattering to even think about not having anyone to do your last rites and carry your coffin. Unfortunately, this is a reality for many and for them, kind-hearted volunteers like those at the Saint Ignatius High School step in, TODAY reported. To the teenagers, it seemed like just another volunteering activity. However, when they became pallbearers and shouldered the coffin of the lonely strangers, they realized something important. Each experience, though heartbreaking, was unique and taught the kids profound life lessons that they’re sharing and taking back with them.
The pallbearer program was launched in the school in 2003. Initially, 12 students took part in around three funerals. Over time, the numbers significantly grew. Presently, around 400 students participate in and support nearly 200 funerals per year. Known as the Saint Joseph of Arimathea Pallbearers Society, the purpose of the arrangement is to ensure that there is someone to help lay the deceased to their final resting place with respect. Over time, the teenagers who participated realized that this noble act was more than volunteering. It was about giving support, respect and meaning to a person during their last rites.
The volunteers have training before they can partake in the funeral services. Knowing how the coffin is to be lifted from the hearse, when and where to place it, the hymns and other factors, all are explained in depth. 17-year-old Grady Leneghan recalled his experience from a funeral in 2023. When he saw no family present for the man who passed away, it was a heartbreaking revelation. “No family really could attend because this person did not have any family,” he remarked. This taught him to be more grateful for his own family. “It makes you appreciate more of what you are, and who you are as a person,” he explained.
Another 16-year-old, Blaise Weidmann, realized that it’s not just helping out but “honoring” the person for one last time. Others have been pallbearers at funerals where there were many grieving present. It was during those moments that the teenagers learned about loss, empathy and other valuable attributes. 18-year-old Evan Solar recounted comforting a mourning woman. “We always hand out a card, a sympathy card, to the family. The woman to whom I handed it wasn’t being super emotional throughout, but when we handed her the card, she broke down in tears and was just so appreciative and thankful.”
Richard Mazyck, campus ministry and service coordinator for the University of Detroit Jesuit school, noted that seeing the empty space with no one to mourn is mind-altering. “It’s really extraordinary to take note of someone who was left to die in the cold on the street," he said. It helped him learn a lesson, too. “It’s a reminder that every person, especially in the Christian religious tradition, is made in the image of God and is deserving of a particular regard and respect.” The Catholic Memorial shared a glimpse of the young gentlemen respectfully carrying a coffin at the funeral of Private First Class John Joseph Winters, a veteran of the U.S. Army.
The caption beautifully explained, “Winters died with no remaining friends or family to celebrate his life. On Monday morning, we were his family.” Peter Folan, president of Catholic Memorial, also noted that these poignant moments are instrumental for shaping the teenagers. “Kids begin to recognize that those are people who have sacrificed much and have displayed incredible courage, duty and honor.” One of the most important takeaways would be what Solar highlighted — “The real service and what really makes an effect on people, is when you can show up and be present to people. That’s what stands out the most.”
More on Amplify
Family gathered at a funeral to mourn their loved one. Then he showed up in a helicopter