Mom begs parents against telling kids what ‘not’ to do and she's got a brilliant point

Getting kids to behave and listen to our verbal instructions is not an easy task. While it might seem that the young ones are being defiant and voluntarily choosing not to listen to their parents, there is a bigger issue that requires our attention. Jenna Mazzillo, who goes by @abanaturally on Instagram, made a video to help parents navigate those tricky moments when their kids do not listen to the "stop, no and don'ts." Mazzillo, who creates content about children's behavior and parenting, clarified the reason why kids do not obey adults at times. 

"It might seem like your kids are choosing not to listen to you but they might actually not know what you want them to do. Clear instructions can make all the difference," Mazzillo stressed in the caption of her video. "'Get your feet off the chair. Don't talk to me like that. Don't throw that.' Here is the thing about using those 'don't' and 'no' statements. We're never telling our children what they should be doing. What should they be doing instead?” Mazzillo clarified. “Additionally, we're just drawing attention to the very thing that we don't want our children to be doing.”

“So what should we do instead?” Mazzillo continued to explain. “Tell our children exactly what we want them to be doing. Instead of saying, ‘Don't put your feet on the chair,’ we would want to say, ‘Put your feet down.’ Instead of saying, ‘Don't talk to me like that,’ tell your child exactly what you want them to say.” Mazzillo urged the parents to be crystal clear with their instructions to make the kids understand what is exactly expected from them. "Make sure when you're telling them what to do, use it in a positive phrase and avoid using those no and don't statements,” Mazzillo concluded.

She also offered her viewers a free "toolkit" consisting of a mini crash course on the 4 crucial strategies that every parent needs to know to make their lives easier. Mazzillo added a few more examples in the caption too. "Instead of saying, 'Be careful!' try, 'Hold onto the railing as you go down the stairs.' This gives them a specific action that promotes safety. Instead of saying, 'Don’t touch that!' try, 'Let’s keep our hands to ourselves when we’re in the store.' Rather than saying, 'Hurry up!' try, 'Put your shoes on so we’re ready to go,'" Mazzillo wrote. 

Her viewers on the internet who came across Mazzillo's video appreciated her for sharing this valuable tip. @alannajaworski applauded, "Love these! I told my mom about this idea. Tell them what they can or should do instead and boy, did I get an eye roll. But I believe in it." @sheisjrose commented, "Your tips have helped me tremendously! Thank you so much for being a resource for us parents out here." @beefaceee joked, "So true. I told my 22-month-old not to come into the garage with me and all she heard was come and proceeded to follow me into the garage." 

You can follow Jenna Mazzillo (@abanaturally) on Instagram for more videos on parenting.