Dad claims he’s 'more of a mom' than his wife for taking care of kids - the internet quickly gives him a reality check
It's never a mother's sole responsibility to look after and raise the kids unless we are talking about a single mom. The fathers should contribute equally to taking care of their children. However, women are mostly burdened with the expectations of looking after the kids along with holding their full-time jobs. A young mom, u/CatSonic12 on Reddit, found herself in a distressing situation where her husband claimed that he had been looking after their kids for long hours, compared to her. As a result, he claimed to be "more of a mom," taking a dig at the stereotypical role of a woman in households.
A 27-year-old wife and mother of 2 toddler boys came forward with her concerns regarding how her husband claimed to be "more of a mom" to their kids, compared to her. The woman had returned to work 6 weeks before sharing the Reddit post. Previously, she was unemployed for 10 months. While she held her 9 to 5 job, her husband worked on Monday, Tuesday, Friday to Sunday and then Wednesday and Thursday the following week with alternate work schedules. While her husband was at work from 6 am to 6:30 pm, they arranged for babysitters to look after the kids. The woman always dropped off her kids to the babysitters and picked them up.
"On the days I worked and he didn't, he was home with them and vice-versa for me," the woman wrote in her post. But one morning, her husband said something unusual to her and that left the woman shocked and frustrated. Her husband remarked how he was watching the kids more than her and he felt more like a mom than their dad. "In the 10 months I was a stay-at-home mom and not working, I never once threw in his face that I was the primary caretaker or that I was any better than him. But he has this huge issue with being a parent alone," she further wrote. The man even told his kids while watching them that he was being their "mom for the day."
"He sees it as if he is being a 'mom' and a better one at that according to him, when he doesn’t have me to help do it with him," the post continued. "I don’t know what to say to him or how to explain that he’s not being a mom. He’s being a parent without him freaking out on me. He can’t afford to keep me at home so I had to get a job and I never threw it in his face that 'he doesn’t make enough so I have to work and he has to also parent.'" At the end of her post, the woman turned to the Reddit community, seeking advice on what she could possibly do in her situation. "How can I kindly tell him he’s just being a parent and not doing 'mom' things? Just because he now does it more often than me, doesn’t make him 'more of a mom,'" she concluded.
The Reddit community was furious at the man's behavior towards his wife and children and decided to give him a reality check. u/sprknsprnkl noted, "Why do men think being a dad doesn't mean equally responsible for the kids? He's literally being a dad and claiming your 'mom' role to be petty. I think someone is salty about being required to parent." u/FiddleStyxxxx warned, "He is a bad parent and he's stuck with his own life choices. I'm glad you can work and aren't tied to this man as a SAHM. Let him insult you if he wishes and stop pretending he cares about you. This relationship will come to a natural end as you stop babying him and his whims."
u/edgeteen added, "Is he also the kind of person that thinks looking after his kids is babysitting and doing housework in his house is just helping out? It screams to me that he has outdated views of raising children and overall gender roles." In an additional comment, the woman thanked fellow Reddit users for being supportive and understanding. She revealed how she was aware that their relationship was slowly breaking apart with time. In a third comment, the woman elaborated that her husband came from a household where his dad worked long hours and his mother stayed at home. Despite having their first kid without plans and staying home unemployed, she never insulted her husband and took care of her kids.
