Exhausted mom has the best response when grandparents refuse to come over and bug her to 'bring granddaughter to them'
Parents often know what’s best for their children. They know their child’s abilities, and weaknesses and understand what settings are ideal for them to play or relax. Instead of trusting parents and letting them handle their kids, grandparents often throw in their unsolicited advice based on their own experiences. A mom, u/suni159, shared her exhausting experience with her parents and how she dealt with their recurring, careless pestering. The grandparents always insisted their 2-year-old granddaughter come over despite the mom explaining several times why the kid needed to be in her child-proof house. When they refused to listen, she gave them a fitting response.
The mom mentioned that she has a 2-year-old daughter who was being screened for autism. Given the scenario, the woman was trying to be cautious with her child. She mentioned that she had child-proofed her home so her daughter could roam around freely without any worry. “I can allow my daughter to wander around where she likes when at home,” she wrote. The grandparents who live 30 minutes away, had been pestering the mom to bring her toddler over to meet them. She had repeatedly requested them to come over instead so her baby could be safe and not cause trouble. “ Usually, when I take her, she's everywhere and I can't sit down since they have glass and decor close to the floor,” the mom noted.
She added that her grandparents, being seniors, were not as flexible with picking up things off the ground and running behind her daughter. The mom finally gave in and decided to adhere to the grandparents’ request while taking a break herself. “Last week was the last straw, I took my daughter to my parents and of course, she went everywhere," the woman remarked. The playful toddler unfortunately wreaked havoc in the grandparents’ home. “She flooded their toilet, broke a vase, and tried multiple times to climb their furniture,” the mom wrote. She added, “I made sure she didn't get into the glass but I also made sure that I got time to sit down.”
“My mom, of course, was upset with me and berated me for letting my daughter ‘do whatever she wants,’” the woman recalled. The grandparents distressingly learned why the mom had been so cautious and insistent that her toddler not visit. “I told her next time she and my dad are more than welcome to come to my house where it's childproof,” she concluded. The mom also highlighted how exhausting it is for parents to look after their kids in other people’s houses. She said, “Don't get me started on friends who don't have kids saying I can just bring my toddler to their all-white and beige furniture home. It's like people don't believe me when I say it's easier for them to come to me.”
Several parents resonated with the mom's situation and supported her idea of letting her grandparents see for themselves. u/jspiderww333 wrote, “Their attitude might not change, but their actions could. You are completely justified in your feelings and have every right to deny them a visit when they could easily come to you.” u/Zestyclose_Pea9026 added, “You are not doing anything wrong. You’re doing a great job.”