Husband overhears wife talking about leaving him after her career change and responds with a bold move
In modern relationships, both men and women are expected to contribute equally towards raising a family. Often, certain circumstances lead to one of the spouses relying financially on their partner. However, one shouldn't misuse the support. A man on Reddit, u/Shoddy-Armadillo-312, shared his story with the community, revealing how he found out that his wife was planning to leave him after switching her career. The woman was working as a labor and delivery nurse and she wanted to become a specialist cancer nurse.
The man wrote that his soon-to-be ex-wife returned to college and he continued to support her all the while. "She had always seemed happy with her career and our life with our two kids. But I know some people can spontaneously get the urge for something more or different, so it wasn't a big deal," he shared. "It did put some strain on me. Because she was so busy I had to take on a lot more so she could do less," he continued. However, things changed for him when he came home from the office early and overheard his wife talking to her best friend.
"My ex's friend was asking her how she could manage to stay married and keep up the pretense," the post continued. The wife was telling her friend that she didn't leave the man because she wanted to make a career move first to secure her life after separation. "She wouldn't have the time to be a single parent and work and train for her specialty. And that I was able to support her through it as long as I didn't know she wanted out of our marriage and would leave as soon as she secured a new job." Even though her best friend warned her that it wouldn't be an ideal move, the man realized that his wife did not care.
She initially planned to leave her husband and then make him support her until she got a better opportunity. The man was left stunned but he decided what needed to be done. He waited until their kids fell asleep to tell her he was putting an end to their marriage. "She was ready for an argument but I told her not where the kids could hear. We waited until the kids were out of the house and we had it out with each other. She told me I was selfish and shouldn't punish her for changing her mind about us. She said if I was a good man I'd encourage her to leave her job and offer to support her until she was ready to leave," the man wrote.
In the end, the man filed for divorce and moved out of the home. He wanted to fight for the house since he used to live there before he got married. However, his wife's name was on the deed and he didn't want his kids to live in a place that was plagued with conflict. The man explained that their kids were already going through a lot after he decided to divorce his wife. The woman's entire extended family turned against the man.
"My ex is fighting the divorce and her family is telling me that I'm selfish and I should understand that a woman has the right to ensure her stability before ending a marriage. But she'd be stable without college. Her job was secure and before this, she worked enough hours to support herself and the kids alone if she had to," the man concluded, adding that his wife simply didn't want to continue working her old job and was planning to use him for his financial support before leaving him. The man asked the Reddit community to spare some advice and wondered if he was in the wrong for his decision.
u/Lovely_Sunsetz commented, "You’re not in the wrong here. Your wife deceived you not just about her feelings but also about her intentions to use your support while planning her exit." u/Responsible-Side4347 wrote, "No one has the right to treat another as a bank account safety net. Logically, it's a form of Freud. If she is unhappy and wants out of the marriage, she should have pulled the plug or fixed it. Not string you along clueless until she gets you to invest in her and then dump you." u/ThrowRA_Last_Empath mentioned, "She’s been extremely manipulative. Gas-lighting you and saying you heard wrong and are overreacting for starters. That is sad and something I experienced as a teenager however, I was able to call my parents out on it and it stopped as they saw how it impacted me."