9-yr-old asked Luke Bryan how to ‘go on with life’ after loss—his response gave him a much-needed realization
A person is never the same after experiencing the loss of a loved one. Each person’s grief is unique based on the relationship they shared with the deceased. For singer Luke Bryan, too, things were no different, per ABC News. Having dealt with the loss of quite a few loved ones, he was acquainted with different sides of grief. When a 9-year-old fan asked Bryan for some advice about loss, the singer shared words that became a pillar of strength for him, too. Initially, the artist didn’t wish to open up about the pain of losing his brother Chris, sister Kelly and his brother-in-law, per CNN.
Speaking with Anderson Cooper in the podcast “All There Is With Anderson Cooper,” Bryan shared how hard it was to express his grief. “I think with the loss of my brother, you know, I was so young at the time and truly didn't know how to process it,” he explained. However, over time and with the subsequent losses, he learned that being able to help others in their grief was a different comfort. The loss was something he wasn’t able to discuss until a 9-year-old approached him. The singer mentioned that it was a meet-and-greet in North Carolina.
Recalling that moment, he shared, “There was a lot of chaos, but this boy was nine years old. He looked up at me and he had these big tears in his eyes.” The young fan then asked a heartbreaking question. "He looked at me and goes, 'I wanna know how you get through every day having lost your brother and your sister, because I lost my sister and I can't get over it.’” Something shifted the moment Bryan was asked that question. “When that nine-year-old told me that, I dropped down on my knees and did the best job I could to help that young man,” he revealed. The man gave the boy one piece of advice.
“I said, ‘Buddy, you talk to your sister like she is still here. You treat her like she is here every day of your life,” he told the kid. Giving him that bit of wisdom and saying it out loud left an impact on the grieving singer. “It really affirmed my need to talk about my loss,” Bryan remarked. He noted that sharing that feeling is a bittersweet comfort to both the sharer and listener. “Anytime I can talk about this, it is the right thing to do. The people who have tragedy, I hope they can hear our stories and understand they're not alone in their journeys with it,” he added. The encounter became a life lesson to be more vocal about such fragile topics, especially when it has the power to soothe others.
"It was a big moment for me, because I understood the way I live, with a smile on my face, is important to people," Bryan said. He opened up about his siblings’ passing and how tragic those moments were when he heard the news. With his brother, he mentioned that he received a call that Chris had been in a wreck and had not made it. “It was the first time in my life that I had felt pain like that,” he said. Kelly experienced a rare “Sudden Death Syndrome.” Bryan revealed that she was doing her laundry at home and had just suddenly passed. “It was like somebody just turned the switch off on her,” he said. The three losses taught the singer that grief doesn’t have a format. “My grief process with my sister was massively different than my brother. I think the grief comes and goes in waves,” he said.
His faith, the joy and pride in seeing glimpses of his siblings in his nephews and nieces and sharing the pain and love through music were some of the things that helped him overcome. To those going through the gut-wrenching reality, the artist’s message can be soothing. "No one gets out of this thing; we don't get out of this thing alive. Never forget that and understand that every day means something and every day is special," he said. He added, “The only thing that helps is understanding that we're all humans. We process things differently. When I look at myself and my wife's differences in handling grief, I have to respect her for her version of it. She has to respect mine. And then we have to meet in the middle with it too."