Grandma asks if she is wrong for wanting to meet granddaughter without baby's mom there, quickly gets a reality check
For children, before any relationship, the first bond they know is that with their parents. They begin to learn and recognize their parents right after their birth and it is only natural that it is the closest and the most protective relationship ever. A grandma, who goes by u/Comfortable-Fall4478 on Reddit, shared a post asking whether it was wrong for her to ask her 6-week-old granddaughter to be brought to her home without her mum. The woman further explained that she didn’t gel with the mom for several reasons but when she cited the same, people immediately gave her a reality check.
The grandma revealed that her son and his fiancee had a little girl who was 6 weeks old. She added that she used to get along with the fiancee until she got pregnant, after which things seemed questionable. “I asked to be in the room for delivery and she said a clipped ‘no.’ No big deal, it's her choice. But when I went to visit in the hospital, she acted put off that I was there. I figured she was tired and left after 20 minutes to give her space,” the grandma noted. However, this feeling went on for a while and grandma was not happy about it. “Whenever I'm holding the baby, she is hovering. She keeps snapping at me over small things,” she added.
Recalling a few instances, the woman noted how she would hold her granddaughter on her belly using her arm and the fiancee would suggest that the baby was “crying and she obviously didn't like that so stop." Another instance was when the baby was fussing and the grandma used dialogues like, “You won't get your own way with me, you can't play me like that" in a “baby voice” as an attempt to calm her down. The fiancee had her own rules of parenting and so she didn’t approve of the same and said, "She's 4 weeks old, how exactly is she playing you?" The woman also recounted the time she was “kicked out” of their home for offering some parenting advice.
The grandma was upset after the baby spent ample time with the fiancee’s mum with no fuss and began to throw tantrums the minute she was in her arms. “I asked my son if he would bring the baby to visit me without his fiancé because I feel like her attitude toward me is the reason why the baby screams every time I hold her. I definitely think she's picking up on the hostility,” she noted. She added, “I don't know why she even dislikes me now but asking her would be pointless.”
When her son refused to accept the request and suggested she “stop pushing old-fashioned beliefs,” the grandma was upset. People immediately told the grandma she was in the wrong. u/EsmeWeatherwax7a wrote, “You don't know why she dislikes you? I've been reading this for 30 seconds and I know exactly why she dislikes you.” u/He_who_is_person said, “Nobody wants to listen to anyone tell them that they're doing motherhood all wrong. Nobody is ‘trying to ruin’ a relationship but you." u/dart1126 added, “Time to back off a bit. Read the room mom/ grandma. Back. Off. Respect that she is the child’s mother.”