New grandma offers on-point advice to overbearing mother-in-laws who meddle in raising grandkids

New moms need as much support and assistance as possible. Be it from their parents or in-laws, because they can help by offering encouragement, looking after the baby and even giving new parents a breather. However, no mom wants her mother or mother-in-law to interfere by judging, calling her out for doing things differently, and overriding boundaries. A grandparent’s role will always come secondary to that of the parents. A grandma, Wendy Gimpel (@wendygimpelrealtor), revealed that grandparents have the job of helping the parent, not becoming parents all over again. She offered some advice to overbearing mothers-in-law, who often meddle in the upbringing of their grandchildren, and moms all over are appreciating it. 

“All I want to say is, our job as grandparents, in my opinion, is to help our kids be the best parents they can be,” Gimpel said. She noted that, having been parents already, they have had their chance. “And if we did it right or at least partially correct, we get to do this!” Gimpel added as she gestured towards her grandkid, fast asleep in her arms. The elderly woman said that every mom deserves to parent her child. “His wife gets to do [it] the way she wants to do it,” she remarked.

In her opinion, a grandma’s approach should be something like, “I just want to do what you want me to do, and I’m not going to give you unsolicited advice. If you want to ask me something, I’m happy to share how I did it. But, because I did it a certain way doesn’t mean you need to do it a certain way.” The grandma explained how she noticed so many daughters-in-law having trouble with overbearing grandmothers, who become a disturbance instead of a supportive pillar. She offered straightforward advice, “Shut your mouth, be supportive, cook the food, do the laundry and love with an open hand.”

The advice was not hinted at as being disrespectful or mean, but rather to reveal how simple grandparenting can be. “That’s the goal, isn’t it? Just to be supportive and helpful and just to be involved, that’s my goal,” she said. In conclusion, Gimpel urged grandparents to allow their kids to become the “best parents they can be” by giving them leverage to learn and figure things out while having their backs. “They are their own family unit now: they need to do what works for their family,” she noted.

Several moms were moved by her advice and couldn’t help but thank her for sharing an insightful opinion. @tmlbourg remarked, “Yes, it’s a privilege to love them. I don’t want to miss a thing.” @sheaklink wrote, “It felt like you were describing my mom, and I’m here to tell you, it’s the biggest blessing.” @britmummert added, “This. All of this. Scream it out for the opinionated grandparents.” @kristindoodax said, “Keep teaching your generation how to be a good mother-in-law.” @jessicalaurence6 added, “Everyone wants a mother and a mother-in-law like you. I hope I become like you one day.”

You can follow Wendy Gimpel (@wendygimpelrealtor) on TikTok for more content on grandparenting and family relationships.