She told her date she was in town for her brother’s memorial — seconds later, his message about dating expectations and himself made her pull back
Many people get nervous about what to say while initiating a conversation with a potential match over text. Yet, things like decency and compassion are not options but necessities. Threads user Hafeeza Shakir, who goes by @hafeez_creates, shared a post on Friday, October 30, 2026, explaining how she decided to give Facebook Dating a shot. While texting the man, she mentioned that she was in town for her brother’s memorial. To her surprise, his following messages left her confused and made her reconsider the match.
The woman decided to be honest about her brother’s memorial, even though it was a sensitive topic. He offered his sympathy, but the message that came seconds later left her disappointed. After a formal “sorry,” he jumped into introducing himself and talking about his interests. This was not the kind of casual conversation she had expected. He sent her an entire paragraph, which Shakir joked felt like a “dissertation.” In it, he mentioned everything from “dating expectations, physical intimacy, his shoe size,” and so on. Just one giant paragraph bragging about his life. The woman honestly told him she didn’t want to read all that because there would be nothing to discuss on their first date if she already knew everything. He then replied, “Then I ain’t for you. I don’t like back and forth.”
Shakir felt like it was good riddance. However, he texted her again the next morning, but she refused to reply. One of the things to focus on during a date is getting to know the other person. Topics like preferences, boundaries, hobbies, pros and cons can be great icebreakers to kick-start a date and keep the conversation flowing. However, the man already sent her everything from dating expectations to his weight, height, and other details, almost as if he were presenting a personal profile. Many commenters had hilarious opinions about it. @newlyyy_improved said, “He ChatGPTed you. Tell him to sit down.” @jess_beautyinandout added, “He sent you an application without being asked to apply.” @simplyl0vely remarked, “He didn’t even wait for you to ask about him.”
Building a connection takes more than sharing details about yourself. It also requires curiosity about the person on the other side. However, some people get so engrossed in themselves that they forget the whole point of a mutual interaction. In another instance, a woman matched with a man on Hinge. After a few exchanges that felt “rude and unpleasant,” the man sent her a minute-long voice note bragging about himself. He went on and on about his gym session without asking her any questions.
She replied, “Wait, when?” Assuming she was asking when he had worked out, he told her it was just a while ago. She then hit him with, “No, when did I ask?" Instead of continuing the exchange, she decided to unmatch him instantly. A date is meant to be interactive, not a monologue or speech. It's also important to save some genuine conversation for the actual meeting rather than sharing everything through voice notes and lengthy messages.
You can follow @hafeeza_creates on Threads for more stories.