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Woman’s first date with an influencer took a turn when he started filming — then the coffee arrived, and it got worse

The woman was already determined to block him, as there was more than one first-date red flag.
PUBLISHED 12 HOURS AGO
 A man recording a video (L). A woman with coffee looking upset (R) (Representative Cover Image Source: Pexels | Photo by cottonbro studio and Layanne Aguiar)
A man recording a video (L). A woman with coffee looking upset (R) (Representative Cover Image Source: Pexels | Photo by cottonbro studio and Layanne Aguiar)

First dates work best when the focus stays on understanding each other, nothing else. TikTok influencer who goes by @n4shamusic went on a date, and the experience she shared on March 12, 2026, is making her question the entire "social media dating scheme." It was a fellow influencer who slipped into her DMs. Things started to get weird the moment he entered the café and began vlogging the date; she complied at first. However, when they went to get their coffee at the counter, his actions left her questioning everything. 

man taking video (Representative Image Source: Peels | Антон Злобин)
man taking video (Representative Image Source: Peels | Антон Злобин)

When she got there, something already felt off. Her date walked in later, filming himself, camera in hand, as if the moment mattered more than the person. They exchanged a few polite lines, nothing deep. Then they ordered coffee, and she thought things might settle. However, as soon as their drinks were ready, he pulled the camera back out and started directing her. How to hold the cup, when to pick it up, and how to walk back. At that point, she was already in it. And since she’s a creator too, she went along with it. But it kept going. Again and again, he made her redo the same shot, adjusting tiny details until it looked “perfect."

Two people drinking coffee outside a coffee shop. Representative Cover Image Source: Pexels | Mike Jones
Two people are drinking coffee outside a coffee shop. (Representative Image Source: Pexels | Mike Jones)

At this point, it looked less like a date and more like a "full-blown production." The creator was already determined to block him because the recording was not the only first-date red flag. He even asked the waitress if he could get compensation in exchange for promoting the café. So when it ended, there wasn’t much to think about. Blocking him felt less like a reaction and more like restoring a boundary. 

Couple on coffee date (Representative Image Source: Pexels | Gustavo Fring)
Couple on coffee date (Representative Image Source: Pexels | Gustavo Fring)

However, the real twist came in the comment section. The creator did mention that she doesn't entertain men who slide into her DMs, but she saw his TikTok and number of followers, and decided it would be a good "collaborative experience." This is what rubbed many the wrong way because if it was a collaborative experience, then why was she so riled up? Why did she talk about "dating" when it wasn't exactly one? For example, @abichelso said, "The most contradicting story I’ve ever heard," while @kcvswrld commented, "You wanted to date an influencer, but social media ruined dating, okay!"

Image Source: TikTok |@hanzo_hattori_
Image Source: TikTok |@hanzo_hattori_

Image Source: TikTok |@authenticti
Image Source: TikTok |@authenticti

One particular comment from the creator herself stood out. When someone told her not to date people based on followers, this was her exact reply. "I’m not looking for a 'genuine connection,' I very clearly said I’m looking for creative collaborations." This made viewers question her credibility. Since she not only spoke about dating multiple times, she even ended the conversation by saying, "I want to get married one day, but not if it's like this." Many even commented on how she could have said no to filming when her date asked whether she consented to being filmed.

Person browsing TikTok app on thier phone (Representative Image Source: Pexels | Cottonbro Studio)
Person browsing TikTok app on their phone (Representative Image Source: Pexels | Cottonbro Studio)

In the end, it was clear that the man did many things just for the sake of vlogging and aesthetics, especially when he admitted he only goes to “Whole Foods” while filming. And although he was wrong for turning a date into content, the creator was also not entirely in the right for framing it purely as a “dating” issue after calling it a collaborative experience herself. 

For more videos, you can follow @n4shamusic on TikTok.

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