Woman tells mom of two autistic children, ‘That must be hard’ — her heartfelt response turns pity into perspective
Parenthood can come with challenges that are difficult for outsiders to fully understand, but every parent may see those challenges differently. Leila Faye, who posts as @leilaafaye on Instagram, was at the gym when a casual conversation about her two autistic children led a woman to tell her, "That must be hard." She posted about the encounter on September 24, 2026, saying that while the comment caught Leila a little off guard, and rather than simply agreeing, she came up with a response that made the woman see her situation differently.
When the strange woman approached her at the gym, she told Leila that raising her two autistic children "can be" hard. She continued, saying that Leila has to make the best of it. Leila decided to offer her a clearer perspective. She had the perfect response and said, "You know what, they are the best of it." But the encounter did not end there. Instead, the woman continued to show pity. She told Leila that it was a very nice way to look at it. But Leila explained that it was the only way she looked at her children. She said she sees parenthood as a privilege and feels grateful to have been trusted with her children, even when raising them comes with added challenges.
"It’s not lost on me that I have been trusted with these little beings," she said, adding that she wants to guide them through the world and give them the best life possible. The exchange got Leila thinking about how differently people can see the same situation. Instead of viewing her children mainly through the lens of autism or the challenges that come with it, she said she chooses to focus on the joy and responsibility of being their mom. For her, simply getting to be a parent is something to be grateful for. She ended with a broader message about raising children, saying she feels lucky to have the opportunity to guide her kids through life and help make a positive difference in their lives.
Many viewers could also relate to what she said. They said they could relate to the way strangers sometimes react when they find out someone is raising an autistic child. In the comments, @estherfern shared that she works with two nonverbal autistic adults, adding, "They’re literally the best." @kasra_kosrae said, "Dudeeeee, why do I relate to this almost every time we step out to the playground or somewhere outdoors," while @patricia22roche had a different perspective. She wrote, "She probably meant well."
What parents with autistic children experience can sometimes be difficult for other people to understand. In another story, an Instagram creator, Nasha Fitter, recalled taking her autistic daughter, Amara, to a podiatrist, where the doctor watched as she struggled to get her daughter’s shoes off and back on before telling her, "You have it really hard." Fitter said the remark felt more like a judgment than empathy, especially because the doctor had mostly stood by and watched instead of helping. She later reminded parents of children with special needs to look for specialists who have experience working with them.
You can follow @leilaafaye on Instagram for more of her content.
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